TOP 50 SONGS OF 2010 Pt. 4: 20-11

Fell behind a bit, so I guess the whole top 20 will come tonight, erk.... hopefully though, because these are after all my favourite 20 songs of the year, I'll be so inspired that I'll be able to chat crap about them all into the early hours. Anyway... Oh, look at these... what tunes.

20 "Thank You For Your Love" - Antony & The Johnsons

Sumptuous melodrama is always to be expected from Antony and his earth shattering, shimmering Nina Simone-esque tenor, but ne'er yet 'til now have we heard him express the emotion that is expressed here: HAPPINESS. Let's look back to Antony's defining moment, obviously the timestoppingly incredible "Hope There's Someone"; This is the voice of a broken man, one battered down by loneliness in a cruel world, one who's dreams are all but dissolved. And there's nothing quite like hearing this same voice, 6 years on, break out into an uncontrollable ear to ear smile and holler "I want to thank you". Whether this is the love of a newly born relationship, or one that has grown through thick and thin, it matters not. During the 4 minute duration of "Thank You For Your Love" nothing else matters but the unconditional and all encompassing adoration Antony has developed for this individual. And as horns parp out in agreement, moments of musical joy this genuine are few and far between.

19 "Coma Cat" - Tensnake

Being Balearic and sun flecked was popular in underground dance music this summer, but there's nothing like a tune that hits the big time with a hook that refuses to become tedious no matter how much you hear it. "Coma Cat" is timeless; jubilant bells ring out over a regal house beat, and the essence of the early 90s is all over the choppy vocal samples and chunky bass. There's not much you can say about a track like "Coma Cat" except that it has to be heard to understand the sheer jolt of lightning felt at the drop. Every time.

18 "Bermuda" - Kisses

The joy of "Bermuda" on first listen is just how cheap and lo fi it sounds, but oh my, that's the joy in it. 

Kisses are not here to make a big statement; vocally low key and unguilded, but no one can argue with a melody as innocent and wholesome as the one showcased here. Dippy synths plip and plop here and there as warm pads caress the clumsy drum machine, and the effect is heartwarming and achingly gorgeous. What's so charming about Kisses in general is that the real appeal here is in the songwriting. No pretences or big production, just a wonderful melody, a blissful vibe and a song that never gets tiresome.

17 "Teenage Dream" - Katy Perry

Katy Perry has her own snug place in the US pop world. Somewhere between an American Idol and Ke$ha’s drunken slag persona, and all of a sudden Katy Perry is a cheeky role model who can get away with just about anything. A blink of those gorgeous blue eyes and it doesn’t matter that she kisses girls, squirts whipped cream from her nipples or gets drunk on beaches (if Ke$ha does any of that, she’s just dirty). It’s the songs though. When Ms Perry (slash Mrs Russell I guess) shoots, she scores spectacularly. “Teenage Dream” simply is every pop song you’ve ever heard that warms your heart, that makes you want to bunk off work and go to the beach, to go clubbing when you have work at 8am the next day, to do things that make you feel naughty, irresponsible and YOUNG. Yes it’s a love song, but not necessarily to another person... it’s a love song to itself. This song makes you feel like you’re living a teenage dream. Don’t ever look back.

16 "Hang With Me" - Robyn

Of the 3 big singles this year, "Hang With Me" is the one that expresses the most complicated emotion: the one a person feels whilst they heal. "Hang With Me" displays a woman who's been hurt, and hurt badly, but one who is beginning to believe she can, just maybe, love again. It's as she says in "Call Your Girlfriend": "the only way her heart will mend is when she learns to love again", and after falling in love with "Dancing on My Own" (where is that track by the way?! *wink*) I couldn't have found it easier to fall in love again with the understated and thoughtful dancepop of "Hang With Me".

15 "Come Wander" - Delorean

Delorean's Subiza is without a doubt one of the most uplifting dance records of the year, and "Come Wander" is it's dark horse of a centrepiece, tucked away towards the end of the record, but ensuring that the pace does not relent, and indeed if anything it accelerates. With its shamelessly housey piano  hooks and thunderous tribal dance beats, "Come Wander" is the closest to an ibiza club anthem Delorean have thus far created, but the dreamy vocals keep feet from touching the dancefloor, and whilst the track still pulsates, it does so floating giddily in mid air. Oh and the final 30 seconds? Best 30 seconds of instrumental music of 2010. Get ready to go wild.

14 "Counterpoint" - Delphic

Delphic were criticised this year, somewhat unfairly, of lacking originality. Words like "New" and "Order" were thrown around, shit got thrown around. Ok, I exaggerate, but the point is that the sheer scale of the 8 minute "Counterpoint" is one that cannot be argued with. A two chord anthem to end all two chord anthems, the razor sharp beats stumble as they run through streets and empty corridors, hectic synths and hyperventilating guitars speeding to keep up. Singer James Cook tries to convince us that "nothing's wrong" but as he gets increasingly distressed, the track reaches a positively religious climax, and Cook is left screaming "NOTHING, NOTHING, NOTHING" as the strobe light synths escalate and swallow the track whole before a blissful final chord ends matters abruptly. The most joyous emotional breakdown committed to tape this year.

13 "Wonderful Life" - Hurts

After over a year of this instant classic circulating, Hurts finally got the attention they deserved. "Wonderful Life" is simply the perfect pop song. A haunting, life affirming, yet somehow cryptic main lyric that can be taken at face value or seen as something deeper, with a deliciously gothic shawl cast over the track's tumbling rhythms and polished 80s tapestry of Spandau Ballet nuances and New Order basslines. When bands like Hurts get the recognition they deserve without having to change a thing, it really is a wonderful life.

12 "Not in Love" - Crystal Castles feat. Robert Smith

It's astonishing what the presence of a different vocalist can do for a track. "Not in Love" serves as one of the subtler moments of the band's sophomore self-titled record, with a vocodered Alice Glass muttering the lyrics as if giving some dark, ritualistic sermon. When The Cure's Robert Smith (what a catch guys, god knows how they nailed this down) steps up to the mic, angst and intense yearning trailing in his wake, all of a sudden, the year's most unlikely anti-love anthem is uncovered. Smith's desperate cries of "I'm not in love!" battle with euphoric synths that say otherwise, seemingly beefier and more deafening than before. An emotional battle between despairing razor blade synths and a shivering, fearful vocalist, this is truly one of the best, if not the best, collaborations of 2010, and certainly the most moving.

11 "Norway" - Beach House
The longing to get away. This is the essence of Beach House's Teen Dream record. Previous records by the band would pass by in a daydream, lovely, but unwilling to commit emotionally. And then along comes a track like "Norway" and you could be listening to a band reborn. Singer Victoria Legrand is no longer casually conversing with you from the corner of the room, she's whispering in your ear; this is no longer some daydream. Breathlessly delivered wordless chants and spiralling guitar arpeggios raise the Beach House benchmark to a new, astronomically high level, and when the final chorus hits, Legrand's voice swells up and spirals down, and its clear that she's not in a daydream anymore, she wants to reach the other side of that fence, and 'Norway' represents that place. Heartstoppingly beautiful and a revelation.

TOP 10 tomorrow! How exciting. Although not for me, because I already know my top 10.

Top 5 Songs that made me cry this year.

I'm of the weepy sort, this is not a secret. So I present to you the 5 songs that choked me up the most in 2010.

5 "Aretha" - Rumer
Musically one of the more upbeat numbers of her debut Seasons..., "Aretha" is all the more emotional because Rumer is now 31, and the song talks of a childhood dream that seems inconceivable but perfect. "Aretha, I don't wanna go to school, they don't understand me and I think the place is cruel..." she sighs to her idol, but eventually optimistically concludes "I'll never have the right shoes, but I've got the words". For a singer who's been working for so long and for it to finally pay off, "Aretha" is less an ode to a childhood idol, and more an anthem for anyone who's ever felt that their dreams were out of reach.


4 "Walk in the Park" - Beach House
That fuzzy drum machine intro cannot prepare you for Teen Dream's most lump-in-the-throat moment and heartbreaking chorus. For a band whose lyrics are so often nonsensical and cryptic, Beach House normally rely on windswept organs and melancholic guitars to relay their feelings, but in "Walk in the Park" the lyrical message couldn't be clearer: "In a matter of time, you would slip through my mind, in and out of my life..." and combined with one of the most beautiful chord processions the band has ever produced, laced with  yearning guitars and shimmering percussion, "Walk in the Park" is almost too much.



3 "Fuel Up" - Stornoway
You can picture the scene. Final day of the university, you're looking round your halls of residence room, wondering where all the time went and how you became an adult so soon. "Fuel Up" is simply a gorgeous ode to the passage of time and all the fucked up things that hindered your every move but somehow make it worthwhile. "You're a passenger, but your mind is travelling on..." singer Brian Briggs so aptly puts it, as the band waltz sensitively alongside.



2 "In My Eyes" - Robyn
Now "In My Eyes" is a dance song, a boom-thwack banger of a beat and the most dramatic synthchord-slabs you've heard all year, but its the most emotional melodrama you've ever heard, and its message is one that Robyn stands for resolutely, but neversomore as here: 'no matter what shit goes on, I've got your back'. As she would probably put it. On the back of the massive minor to major shifts carrying sweeping life affirming lyrics, Robyn's loyalty to the individual she sings to is so fierce that its emotional punch is like a sock to the gut. "I know you think you're lost but you think again, when you look into my eyes" she implores, and assures "you'll be ok". In a generally horrible year like 2010, no one said "things will get better" than Robyn.



1 "Cry" - Gayngs
If any band know how to celebrate mourning, Gayngs have proven themselves to be certain frontrunners. Whether Godley & Creme (the 10cc members responsible for the distinctly more upbeat and 80s sounding original) are turning in their graves or not is irrelevant; when Gayngs perform Cry we are treated to something authentically whiney, depressing, plodding and self-pitying, but this is the essence of sadness. It’s not pretty, it’s not easy on the ear, but it’s still somehow beautiful. Cry is the sound of the moment when we admit that no, we’re not ok, the moment when all hope finally seems irretrievable. And as voices tearfully wail the titular word over a cheesy, lush soft rock backdrop, we are all reminded that there is a sort of comfort to be gained from giving in to your sadness.

TOP 50 SONGS OF 2010 Pt.3: 30-21

The plot thickens... and gets a bit more commercial .

30 "Get Outta My Way" - Kylie Minogue
Kylie's Aphrodite is 2010's fag hag of pop. It appeases to every camp dance cliche and gleefully dramatic chorus, and "Get Outta My Way" is its diamond encrusted tiara. Producer Stuart Price excessively scatters his eurodisco glitter all over Kylie's effortlessly classy vocals, which are double-quintuple tracked over the strobelight mania of a chorus. The whole thing is about as feel good a track as anything you've heard not only Kylie but any female artist do in years, whether as a breakup song or simply as a song for when you're late for work.



29 "Rude Boy" - Rihanna
A hint of the "Loud" animal we would see later this year, this latter single from 2009's Rated R was a standout simply because it wasn't dark or reflective. It showed us the Rihanna we know and love: tough, dominant, seductive and just classy enough to get away with the occasional dutty phrase. Although of similar pace to "What's My Name?", released later in the year, "Rude Boy" isn't dreamy or suggestive; it's in your face, cocky and impossible to ignore.



28 "We R Who We R" - Ke$ha
On paper and indeed on first listen, this could seem like nothing but going through the motions for Ke$ha. It's got the drunken whore rap verse followed by the huge autotuned chorus and thumping beat, and the whole thing resembles a mud slinging fight between Gaga and Katy Perry. But what becomes apparant about "We R Who We R" with repeat listens, is that it actual has a slight poignancy about it. Call me crazy, but to me, this isn't about glitter or whisky or casual sex; it's about individuality, and for the first time Ke$ha is making her real message heard. And through the medium of a chorus as catchy as that of "Tik Tok". Who cares if Ke$ha wears the same underwear for 2 weeks in a row? She's not saying that's what you should do, she's just saying it's ok to do what the fuck you want. I mean there is a limit, but I see where she's coming from. Anyway, tune.



27 "Call Your Girlfriend" - Robyn
What's this?! So much for being the heartbroken girl dancing on her tod, Robyn's now the "other woman"?! Talk about double standards! Well, it's easy to forgive her, and also easy to see how the gentleman in question could've been seduced by this Robyn, when you hear the caramel smooth melodies and euphoric rise and fall of the Nu-Abba backing of "Call Your Girlfriend". "Tell her the only way her heart will mend is when she learns to love again" Robyn advises and firmly confirms "it's gon be me and you" as her voice disapparates and begins to fly away into a cloud of beautiful vowels. It's tough going through a break up, but with Robyn there not only to empathise but also to offer both sides of the story... who the hell needed any other pop singer in 2010?



26 "Shutterbugg" - Big Boi feat. Cutty
Has there been a huger beat this year then that of "Shutterbugg"? Glass smashes and keyboards cry out like it's 1977, and a thousand deep voiced robots knock rhythmically on your front door. There's no way out from this track, so it's futile to resist. As Cutty sweetly sings "You're in my system", and after just one listen, this track most certainly will be.



25 "Tightrope" - Janelle Monae feat. Big Boi
"Tightrope" is one big funky grin from start to finish. The bonkers but brilliant androgynous wonder that is Janelle Monae goes all out on "Tightrope" to showcase everything that makes her great. Whether it's the sheer melodrama in her soulful voice, the absurdly addictive unhinged rhythms or the crazy motown brass section (a personal musical highlight of 2010), Janelle does "what the fuck is this? I love it!" better than any other artist this year. A musical secret agent, stationed loosely in Urban town, whilst engaging in countless missions to the districts of big band, funk and disco and commandeering the odd Ukelele. Extravagent and imaginative; a thorough delight.



24 "Time Machine" - Robyn
One thing Robyn was reluctant to do on her UK self-titled Debut was to go all-out dance. Preferring to dabble in urgent big beat on "Cobrastyle" and "Be Mine", throwing out the hip hop beats on tracks like "Handle Me", and working quirky techno heavily into her sound pretty much everywhere, our first lady of Swede-pop seemed to be afraid to be too commercial. The "Body Talk" records couldn't be more different, and "Time Machine" is hands down the catchiest straight-up dancepop anthem she's ever done. And with a chorus bigger than Jesus, it's easy to see that Robyn's inhibitions and awkward pop quirks are well and truly in the past.



23 "Young Blood" - The Naked and Famous
Just when you think the world of blogpop can't throw out any more gems this year, we get the Passion Pit esque Naked and Famous, who are most certainly destined for commercial success. A clattering synth refrain rings out over a bassy wall of fat distortion, and eager falsetto cries out triumphantly, with an "Eee-yeah-eee-yeah-ee-yeah-eee-yeah!" refrain thrown in for good measure. A perfectly formed alternative pop song and probably the best debut single of 2010.



22 "Bastard" - Tyler, The Creator
Horrorcore Hip Hop without beats = The definition of uncomfortable listening. Cheap schlock strings and cheesy horror movie synth brass make the odd appearance as a plodding piano rolls round and round, giving plenty of room for the blunt and disturbing phrasing of Tyler to reverberate inside your head. The distant voice of a therapist emplores Tyler to open up at the opening of the song, but within 30 seconds, I'd wager he wished he hadn't. Tyler covers self-harm, rape, suicide, killing his father, his insecurities, his sick fantasies and claims to be Satan's son. Over the course of 6 minutes, Tyler proves himself as the new Eminem: a near unbearable listen, but strangely poignant. And a little bit scary.



21 "Theme From Yours Truly" - Beat Connection
And now for something completely random. Another group I found in blogland, Beat Connection are as balearic as they come, and "Theme From Yours Truly" (not an actual film) is as life affirming as balearic can muster. Euphoric bells chime and tambourines jingle, but a delicious Beyonce vocal sample makes the track that bit more glorious. In a list mainly made up of perfectly formed pop songs, this is one track that doesn't do a lot, because it doesn't have to. Just repeating those same gorgeous refrains for an out-of-body 6 minutes is enough for me.



That's enough for today my dears, top 20 begins tomorrow!

My 5 favourite Nicki Minaj lyrics.

Like most red blooded heterosexual males, I adore Nicki Minaj. The tacky extensions, the mental institution faces, the rock solid bum implants (or not), and most importantly the most unpredictable mouth this side of Miranda Hart. Here's a few of my favourites.

5
"And he sweatin' me just cause I got the tightest hole, But I couldn't find that th-thing wit a microscope"
(Rihanna's "Raining Men")


4
"Cat's away while the mice-a play, L.O.L. Smiley Face, have a nice-a day!"
(Remix of Mariah Carey's "Up Out My Face")

3
"It's Nightmare on Elm Street and guess who's playing Freddie?"
(Ludacris' "My Chick Bad")

2
"And I'm all up, all up, all up in the bank with the funny face, And if I'm fake, I ain't noticed cos my money ain't!"
(Kanye West's "Monster")

1
"I just pop up on these hoes on some pimple shit, and put the iron to ya face y'old wrinkle bitch"
("Check it Out")

HONORARY MENTION. CRISIS.

I'm 22. I'm not as young and aware as I used to be.

So I must apologize for forgetting a crucial 2010 song in my list. I cannot alter anything now (and I suppose technically we heard them in 2009), but I am wholly sorry to Lady Gaga and all her fans as I did not include Alejandro or Telephone in my 2010 list out of sheer forgetfulness.

It's times like these when a man's dignity is at stake, so I hope this memoriam will at least help towards this tragedy.

Something to ease the pain. I'm still in a remix mood.

Fucking love that Alphabeat remix.

TOP 50 SONGS OF 2010 Pt. 2: 40-31

Such fun! More great music.


40 "What's My Name?" - Rihanna feat. Drake
Rihanna's pop music is so effortlessly sun flecked and so obviously influenced by dancehall that it thaws even the coldest winter day. The stop start beat, relaxed vocal hook and gentle synth chords ooze sex, and Drake's sleazy cameo makes the whole thing feel a little bit guiltier. Rihanna has a hint of the Rude Boy dominatrix about her here, taunting "I wanna see if you can go long time widda girl like me", but she's not got the insecurities of the Rated R lass; The Rihanna of "What's My Name?" only feels effortless confidence. And if there was ever a song that would require hypnosis to get out of your head, it would be this one.


39 "Infinity Guitars" - Sleigh Bells
So much crazy shit to choose from from Sleigh Bells' donkey punch of a debut, but there's something about "Infinity Guitars" that stands out from the others. Whilst tracks like "Kids" and "Run The Heart" are driven by monster robot Hip Hop beats, "Infinity Guitars" lives up to its name, the shotgun toting central riff exploding halfway through the song into a firestorm of distortion in which singer Alexis deliriously jumps all over. It's one of the album's most disarming and memorable sections, and on a bonkers album like Treats, that's something worth applauding.


38 "White Sky" - Vampire Weekend
"White Sky" makes this list on its wordless chorus hook alone, quite simply. No one does unadulterated joy quite like Vampire Weekend, and this gem off brilliant second record Contra is bursting with it. And I don't know if I'm crazy or not, but it sounds like the best Christmas song ever. Maybe it's the ethereal synths and angelic vocals, or just that the whole thing feels like a generous gift to your ears. The happiest song of the year; a real grin inducer, whatever the fuck the song's actually about. Enjoy this video also:


37 "Zorbing" - Stornoway
Another lovely, lovely song from a lovely, lovely band. Oxford's Stornoway are an awkwardly endearing bunch of chaps, and their geeky lyrical allusions (Zorbing compares an unknown extreme sport to falling in love... great chat up line) only make them more charming. But it's the folky picking and barbershop quartet vocals that really provide the charm; and when those trumpets jump eagerly in, you've fallen in love yourself. And yes, it does actually feel a bit like rolling down a steep hill in a transparent plastic ball! (Do your research with Stornoway songs, it's ultimately more rewarding)


36 "One Touch" - Mini Viva
Whilst the rather more famous Xenomania girl group, Girls Aloud, twist the production team’s spacey Eurodance to their quirky, aloof means, Mini Viva make it sound seductive and sexy. It’s no new ground, but Xenomania, led by mastermind Brian Higgins, are at the top of their game, providing a shamelessly 1990s, pulsating Hi NRG tapestry. Mini Viva themselves taunt and tease, with phrases such as “Kiss, kiss, it’s contagious” summing up neatly what makes this track great, and arguably their best single so far.


35 "Any Which Way" - Scissor Sisters
One glance at the cover of Night Work, and you know you're in for a rocky ride. Those buttocks may be clenched tight, but Scissor Sisters are gonna fuck you (oh, excuse me... "funk" you that is) any which way they can. But whatever your apprehensions are, seriously, let them. It's a hell of a lot of fun. "Any Which Way" is camp even by Scissor Sisters standards, and as D-I-S-C-O as they can get away with. Each hook is a guilty pleasure, each clavichord flurry an embarrassing dance move, each snare the sound of a whip on leather. "In front of my parents, I don't give a damn baby, just take me..." Damn. Sex has not sounded this much fun in years. And these guys are gagging for it.


34 "Your Love" - Nicki Minaj
Totally out of the blue this came. The woman known for ranting at breakneck pace, finding absurd rhymes that other rappers wouldn't think of in a million years, well, whaddya know, she's got a soft side? Debut "Pink Friday" showcases a lot of other R&B jams, but the somehow romantic "Your Love" is head and shoulders above them all. That Annie Lennox hook provides the schmooz and although Nicki can't avoid a few quirky Minajisms, see Bruce Willis tribute, she's genuinely subdued and humble here. Who'da thunk?


33 "Cheers (Drink to That)" - Rihanna
"Put it all on my card tonight, Might be mad in the morning but you know we're going hard tonight"
I seriously doubt that Rihanna has to worry about putting anything on her card these days, but her understanding of the poor person's 9-5 mentality is sound. "Cheers to the freakin' weekend, I'll drink to that" she slurs as even the beat stumbles drunkenly on. But everyone is okkkkaaaaay, don't worry, everything's just peachy. It's this laid back attitude that worked on "What's My Name?", but it works even better here, all campfire strummed guitars and drunken mob backing vocals, and even a karaoke section. Genius. And I feel the need to mention the Avril Lavigne sample so here I go: THAT Avril Lavigne sample. Thanks.


32 "Out of Tune" - Real Estate
And now for something completely different. On Real Estate's single "Out of Tune" the spirit of the Beach Boys hovers above, but never quite reaches ground, and so Real Estate's wonderful guitar tones are left floating in space; dreamy and exotic, but also rather lonely. There's a sense of resigned defeat about "Out of Tune", as if each strum of the guitar and murmur about weeping clowns is a brave smile that covers a deep sadness. As the track fades out, despite the sweeping melancholy, you can't help but feel you'd rather be here than wherever Real Estate wanted to go.


31 "Crossover" - Magnetic Man feat. Katy B
Katy B's solo debut "Katy On A Mission" showed her as tough, in control and manipulative, and so her warmth and welcoming on "Crossover" is hard to believe, and thus her silky tones have an air of foreboding about them. She tempts and teases without saying what she really means, offering to "put your every wrong to right", and all this talk of crossing over certainly suggests something of the dark side to me. But of course, none of this great performance would be half as good if it weren't for the eerie clamouring of MagMan's learing grin of a dubby backing track. Synths fly around like fireflies and the bass is subtle but threatening. It's only half a story told, but the track tells more by what it doesn't say.


OK, onwards with Boxing Day my chums! 30-21 tomorrah!

Top 5 Remixes of 2010.

Before I carry on, I realised that certain remixes that appeared on my "master list" didn't (spoiler haha) make my top 40, but because the art of the remix was very refined this year I feel the need to pay 'homage' to my favourite remixes that I boycotted from the list.

5 "Spanish Sahara" (Chad Valley Remix) - Foals

From a cold and difficult 7 minute slog (I wasn't a fan) to something that resembles Spandau Ballet on hallucinogenics, Chad Valley created something rather beautiful as per usual. Singer Yannis sounds weepy and self-pitying on the original, but here, his double tracked voice is shimmering and dreamy. "Total Life Forever" indeed.



4 "Dancing on My Own" (Fred Falke Remix) - Robyn
Making a sad song sadder and more wistful with some mournful chords, Fred Falke's take on Robyn's crowning glory doesn't much up the dance stakes, in fact toning down the brutal pulsating bass of the original and replacing it with glowing chords and a late 90s house sensibility that indeed feels like dancing on your own. If the original is desperate and emotional, this mix is one sung from the aftermath; this Robyn is resigned to loneliness, and there's no Fred Falke version of Hang With Me or Indestructible, so it seems that this is where it ends. How mean of you Fred, really.


3 "Heads Will Roll" (A Trak Remix) - Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Something of a 2010 club classic, this is probably the most popular indie remix of the year, partially thanks to Annie Mac's fondness for it (she included it on her "Presents 2010" mix CD). And absolutely deservedly. Addictive beyond belief, Even Karen O is a slave to the demonic steel drum chords and commandeering funky house bass, chopping heads off left, right and centre on the dancefloor. Dangerous stuff.


2 "Starry Eyed" (Russ Chimes Remix) - Ellie Goulding
Whoa, where did THIS come from? The original "Starry Eyed" was fun, but a little bit diddly diddly to really live up to its subject matter (being high on life or drugs or whatever). However, when the Russ Chimes remix finally kicks in properly after a long 3 minute build, not going mad is simply NOT an option. Goulding's voice is cut up and haemorrhaged all over the track, as dirty throbbing bass and massive beats collide. But that piano, OH that piano. That's when you know shit's going down. The whole track is perfectly structured and a true clubber's delight; CRAZY. Though not quite as crazy as my number one...


1 "Get Outta My Way" (BeatauCue Remix) - Kylie Minogue
This is less a remix, more a cut and paste exercise. BeatauCue rip apart samples of this feel good anthem and tear scratches into the original record, so what we are left with it something that has to be heard to be believed. Kylie is essentially everywhere, screaming in your ear in distress as a colossal beat pummels her into submission and beyond. THE intense funky house experience of the year without a doubt.

TOP 50 SONGS OF 2010 Pt. 1: 50-41

Merry Christmas! With Take That, Rumer and Ministry of Sound's Disco Anthems on the playlist (all presents for my mother I might add, but I complain about none, although my Nicki Minaj CD remains untouched, I feel I owe that much to my mum to not expose her to the contents), I feel the need to round up the year in music with my joyfully geeky top 50 of the year. And a bit of pointless blabber about music in general.

Through endless indie acts being heralded as "genius" and "" by 'credible' sources (some actually were, see Arcade Fire), to a plethora of summer haze dreampop that I rather enjoyed floating around blogs, to more acts crossing the fine line now present between urban and electronic dance music, this year hasn't been half bad for music IMO. It's been about 40/60. Which I'll take.

The girls did well this year. Kylie released the gay album of the decade, Kelis broke away from stereotypes and made a straight up brilliant house record, Katy Perry had great bubblegum pop singles, despite a disappointing album, and Nicki Minaj tried her damndest to live up to the hype and ALMOST did it, although that album cover exceeds expectations by a long shot, good on her.

Rihanna was great as ever, but ROBYN is the pop success of the year as far as I'm concerned. 3 mini albums followed by a mini greatest hits of the year, and not ONE filler track. Standing ovation.

The X Factor certainly has hit an all time low though. The show is brilliant, like a soap opera for those pretending to know about music, but the results have been appauling this year. I'm not talking about fluffy voiced Matt Cardle winning, I'm talking about the ACTUAL results... the albums that have been spurned from the show.

JLS's second album was just, just horrific, Cheryl Cole's voice now resembles a drunken ferret stumbling all over some actually not too bad tracks on her new album. I'd love to hear "Yeah Yeah" or "Amnesia" given to a decent singer, but I guess I never will. Last years top two, Joe McElderly and Olly Meh (I'm clever am I not?), both showed how little they have to offer musically with dull, insipid records with zilch personality or flair. And can I just say, "Ambitions"... a great song when performed by the band that it belongs to, Donkeyboy. Check these out.





Ah, the spirit of Bronski Beat. I have a desire to go and listen to "Smalltown Boy" right now.

Anyway, I could talk about the ingenuity and reinvention of indie with the Foals and Arcade Fire albums, and how great Janelle Monae is, and how Nicki Minaj has totally reinvented female identity within Hip Hop, but frankly I don't think it'd be any good. Read NME or something.

I just want to get on with talking about songs I like now thanks. 10 a day for next 5 days, then top 20 albums over the last two days of the year. That'll work out neatly I think. Yes.


50 "Whip My Hair" - Willow Smith
So wrong and yet so right. Who'd've thought a 9 year old girl could bring the most swagger to Hip Hop in 2010? (The absurdity of this statement is duly noted and ignored)



49 "Cold War" - Janelle Monae
"So you wanna be free? Well, below the ground's the only way to be"
Euphoric, intense yet poignant, sometimes uncomfortably so. A driving funk gallop gives beef behind Monae's desperate and emotional performance of this conspiracy anthem of the heart.



48 "My Boots" - Lights
"When I'm in the summer I forget how much I love her when she's in the groove."
Not a lesbian anthem. Supporting the similarly sugary synthpop act Owl City in the spring, Lights is a little Canadian ray of sunshine. Happy little ditties about video games and higher powers were in abundance on her sweet as pie debut, but this one off ode to winter is amoungst her most charming. Tinkly synths fall like snowflakes outside and gentle guitars crackle and pop like embers in the fireplace. Lovely.



47 "Katy on a Mission" - Katy B
The dubstep invasion of the charts reached its peak with this instant club classic. When Katy B talks of "erupt(ing) into the room" you can feel it through your speakers. Despite this, the track maintains a leisurely pace and thus an effortless class. When Katy taunts "so I sip his drink as I hold his gaze", you know she's in control.



46 "Let the Sun Shine" - Labrinth
The definition of R&B and Hip Hop was stretched to breaking point this year, with house beats and trance chords working their way into any commercial urban track you'd care to mention, and this life-affirming number by producer Labrinth is a prime example, practically a synthpop anthem. Nevertheless, the infectious warmth and happiness of this track makes genres seem irrelevant. So what if the lyrics are somewhat nonsensical? When Labrinth breaks into the ear-to-ear beam of a chorus, you somehow understand the joy in every word.



45 "Roman's Revenge" - Nicki Minaj feat. Eminem
"Yeah I said it... HAS-BEEN"
A bit risky of Nicki to drop this line in a track featuring the once great Eminem, but the faux-pas is easily overlooked amoungst the sheer volcanic eruption of the threatening, the unhinged and the outright bizarre that is Nicki's outstanding performance on this highlight from "Pink Friday". Eminem's performance is slightly cringy but, all things considered, not too bad. Though I suppose if Nicki can make a track featuring Will.I.Am credible, anything is possible.



44 "Indestructible" - Robyn
"I'm gonna love you like I've never been hurt before"
After the meltdown of "Dancing on My Own" and the healing in "Hang With Me", "Indestructible" comes as a triumphant overcommance of fear and hurt and declares that its ready to love again. The dramatic neo-classical backing and tidal wave synth chords second the sentiment admirably. Although probably the weakest of the three tracks, its placing at #43 is a decent hint at how incredible Robyn's output has been in 2010. More to come, needless to say.

(P.S. I LOVE this video)



43 "Suicide Dream 2" - How to Dress Well
Truly the best musical representation of any kind of dream in living memory. Vocals come and go indistinctly as a darkly ethereal pad crackles and distorts its beauty. The words are mere shapes, distant callings, not meant to be understood literally, but emotionally. The whole track is a vague, structureless poem that repeats itself indefinately, expands and takes the listener on a journey. Don't expect to understand the dream in question, but expect the music to hint as the fear and isolation hidden beneath the musical fog. Maybe it's best not to look much closer.



42 "Lions!" - Lights
"You don't have to feel safe to feel unafraid"
An uplifting message however you read it. Yet this is more than some feel good anthem: this is a self admitted ode to World of Warcraft. Which makes me love it all the more. As itsy bitsy as ever, timid beats and twinkle-twinkle-little-star vocals, but Lights has the remarkable ability to create a big noise for a little woman. Her head in the clouds and her music made in her bedroom, but this is music made for stadiums. Stadiums filled with computer geeks? Perhaps. But Lights makes it ok to be a geek, and most certainly ok to sing about computer games.



41 "Slow" - Rumer
"My love, my love, my love... killin' time is easy when you're here"
This breakthrough song for hazy voiced Rumer is one of the only truly, unashamadly romantic songs of the year. The song doesn't have a pace, it floats in mid air, each instrumental note hanging on Rumer's next breathless word, a woman who wants to give in to love when others tell her to be cautious and "slow this right down". The effect is captivating, heart wrenching and an exciting introduction to one of the years most talented new singers.

Wicked, DA DUN DONE. 40-31 tomorrow! Now I think champagne. I'm a little behind in the Christmas stakes.